Bank of America – F#@k You, Eat S*#t, Die…REPEAT!

I am a tad perurbed.

It seems Max will be broke in 14 months…

You see, he has a SAVINGS account at Bank of America.

Here is his first statement .

We have been trying to teach our kids a little bit about savings and budgeting. We have saving and investing accounts for them, but now that they are old enough to spend their own money, they are old enough to manage it. We agreed on $80/month allowance for some household chores and than at the end of they year, we would double whatever was left in their savings account.

I went with Rachel and Max to Bank of America because it was walking distance to our home. I specifically defined what the kid’s accounts would be used for. Instead I was signed up for the ‘sheister account’. My kids are getting charged as if they were borrowing money from the bank, not giving it to them to lend out.

There is NO EASIER business to run than a bank. Technology has only made it drop dead simple and scalable. If you run a bank into the ground, you should be hauled off to a dark hole. In America, you get a bonus with taxpayer money within three months.

I guarantee two things:

1. I am pissing in the wind

2. The young lady who helped open my accounts and steal from me, will piss in her pants a little Monday (if it’s not another bank holiday) when she sees me.

PS – Once again, you should not be able to use the name AMERICA in your company’s name if you are a criminal organization

PSS – Apple must open a bank

64 comments

  1. Anonymous says:

    Open the account at a local bank.

    Move any and all acounts you have to the local bank.

    Tell all of your friends.

    Let BOA die, they deserve it…

  2. Brock99 says:

    Open the account at a local bank.

    Move any and all acounts you have to the local bank.

    Tell all of your friends.

    Let BOA die, they deserve it…

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  11. Anonymous says:

    I feel the same way about my money center bank, which is why I removed every penny (save for a business account) in July 2008. I knew their capital structure was at risk even at that time and I decided to flee the burning building. That bank has since been absorbed by another money center back of less competence and with a much less customer friendly orientation. I now kind of run my own bank, buying treasuries and CDs on the open market (or directly) and then passing the interest to a bank where it is immediately reinvested or used for business or personal expenses.

    What really worries me is that this example of incompetence could be spread to smaller independent banks. When I see what they are offering for CD rates, I know that many of them are operating on the lunatic fringe of the credit risk profile.

    Except for major transactions in which I am required to confirm via a cashiers check, I am no longer using an American money center bank as my custodian or partner. Money center banks have lost their minds in terms of operating posture, and now they are killing the last hope they have of survival. They are killing customer service. Fees are only the half of it, getting a knowledgable person on the other end of the phone or at the other end of the desk is the unwritten horror story.

    Just my two cents worth.

  12. Steve says:

    If Wal-mart had gotten permission to start a bank, BAC would out of business. Who rifled Wal-mart’s plans? – the same actors who brought us the current mess – Greenspan, Geithner, Dodd, Frank, …

    I hope all have read Talibi’s latest. The saddest thing about the last 12 months is that the new Presidency did not bring change, but instead even further cemented the ownership of Washington by the large investment and commercial banks.

    http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/story/30481512/wall_streets_naked_swindle

    The system IS broken. Indeed.

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  14. i use a local bank, now major regional and its ok.

    last year i blogged about my investment in a small community bank that could
    not get it's charter so I have tried to be in control of my own fees that
    way, but obviously my partners had too much math on their resumes and we
    were not approved.

    the system is broken right now.

  15. i use a local bank, now major regional and its ok.

    last year i blogged about my investment in a small community bank that could
    not get it's charter so I have tried to be in control of my own fees that
    way, but obviously my partners had too much math on their resumes and we
    were not approved.

    the system is broken right now.

  16. Anonymous says:

    B of A has always been this way. Ten years ago they bought a smaller bank where I was a client, and I could not close my account fast enough! At that time, they were charging you for everything. You got nicked if you used the drive thru teller more than a certain amount, if you didn’t use your ATM or debit card, if your balance was below a crap-ton, plus some more. I never did understand how they made it so big. It’s like they don’t even try to compete with other banks (as far as fees go) and yet, people flock to them. Crazy indeed.

  17. IRON100 says:

    I feel the same way about my money center bank, which is why I removed every penny (save for a business account) in July 2008. I knew their capital structure was at risk even at that time and I decided to flee the burning building. That bank has since been absorbed by another money center back of less competence and with a much less customer friendly orientation. I now kind of run my own bank, buying treasuries and CDs on the open market (or directly) and then passing the interest to a bank where it is immediately reinvested or used for business or personal expenses.

    What really worries me is that this example of incompetence could be spread to smaller independent banks. When I see what they are offering for CD rates, I know that many of them are operating on the lunatic fringe of the credit risk profile.

    Except for major transactions in which I am required to confirm via a cashiers check, I am no longer using an American money center bank as my custodian or partner. Money center banks have lost their minds in terms of operating posture, and now they are killing the last hope they have of survival. They are killing customer service. Fees are only the half of it, getting a knowledgable person on the other end of the phone or at the other end of the desk is the unwritten horror story.

    Just my two cents worth.

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  19. Clark says:

    I quit using Bank of America in the late 90s for similar reasons. But what you are really saying is you didn’t read the account agreement and fees before signing up?

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  21. simplycomplex says:

    B of A has always been this way. Ten years ago they bought a smaller bank where I was a client, and I could not close my account fast enough! At that time, they were charging you for everything. You got nicked if you used the drive thru teller more than a certain amount, if you didn't use your ATM or debit card, if your balance was below a crap-ton, plus some more. I never did understand how they made it so big. It's like they don't even try to compete with other banks (as far as fees go) and yet, people flock to them. Crazy indeed.

  22. Clark says:

    I quit using Bank of America in the late 90s for similar reasons. But what you are really saying is you didn't read the account agreement and fees before signing up?

  23. ivanhoff says:

    Few years ago I opened an account in BAC for the very reason that it was very close to my place and it has wide network of branches around the country. Since then, every few months or so I am considering moving to another bank. . America doesn't need “too big to fail” banks. They represent too much risk for the financial system. For me they are too big to be let to survive. Let me know when you find the right bank for your needs. Maybe such banks doesn't exist yet and someone has to found it. Peer to peer landing is growing by the day and something tells me that there will be thousands of new one person banks that will establish in the following decade. I know for 2 peer-to-peer lending companies that will start next year and the products they will offer will compete with the current banks rather successfully. And their timing right. Today, most people hate their banks.

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  25. Steve says:

    If Wal-mart had gotten permission to start a bank, BAC would out of business. Who rifled Wal-mart's plans? – the same actors who brought us the current mess – Greenspan, Geithner, Dodd, Frank, …

    I hope all have read Talibi's latest. The saddest thing about the last 12 months is that the new Presidency did not bring change, but instead even further cemented the ownership of Washington by the large investment and commercial banks.

    http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/story/3048

    The system IS broken. Indeed.

  26. Anonymous says:

    Howard, don’t scare the piss out of the clerk, take the prick manager down with her.

    If you have any US military service, or the son or brother of such a person, the absolute cream of the crop in insurance and banking is USAA. My kids all have accounts with debit cards and NO fees. I just electronically drop their allowance in automatically every 2 weeks. In my opinion, USAA is THE best..Check out their awards. Somebody is doing it right. https://www.usaa.com/inet/ent_utils/McStaticPages?key=usaa_awards

  27. Ben Weiss says:

    Howard,Have you thought about moving them to a joint-brokerage account, say at Scottrade, where they can get a debit card (if needed for purchases/ATM visits) and collect interest on any cash on hand. Probably the best deal in town…

    Alternatively, if an investment account doesnt work for this kind of situation, try ING Direct for a savings account or USAA (mentioned by another follower below). Both will not rip you off, as BoA has…

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  29. bweiss says:

    Howard,

    Have you thought about moving them to a joint-brokerage account, say at Scottrade, where they can get a debit card (if needed for purchases/ATM visits) and collect interest on any cash on hand. Probably the best deal in town…

    Alternatively, if an investment account doesnt work for this kind of situation, try ING Direct for a savings account or USAA (mentioned by another follower below). Both will not rip you off, as BoA has…

  30. ivanhoff says:

    Few years ago I opened an account in BAC for the very reason that it was very close to my place and it has wide network of branches around the country. Since then, every few months or so I am considering moving to another bank. . America doesn’t need “too big to fail” banks. They represent too much risk for the financial system. For me they are too big to be let to survive. Let me know when you find the right bank for your needs. Maybe such banks doesn’t exist yet and someone has to found it. Peer to peer landing is growing by the day and something tells me that there will be thousands of new one person banks that will establish in the following decade. I know for 2 peer-to-peer lending companies that will start next year and the products they will offer will compete with the current banks rather successfully. And their timing right. Today, most people hate their banks.

    • i use a local bank, now major regional and its ok.

      last year i blogged about my investment in a small community bank that could
      not get it’s charter so I have tried to be in control of my own fees that
      way, but obviously my partners had too much math on their resumes and we
      were not approved.

      the system is broken right now.

    • i use a local bank, now major regional and its ok.

      last year i blogged about my investment in a small community bank that could
      not get it’s charter so I have tried to be in control of my own fees that
      way, but obviously my partners had too much math on their resumes and we
      were not approved.

      the system is broken right now.

  31. flycg says:

    Howard, don't scare the piss out of the clerk, take the prick manager down with her.

    If you have any US military service, or the son or brother of such a person, the absolute cream of the crop in insurance and banking is USAA. My kids all have accounts with debit cards and NO fees. I just electronically drop their allowance in automatically every 2 weeks. In my opinion, USAA is THE best..Check out their awards. Somebody is doing it right. https://www.usaa.com/inet/ent_utils/McStaticPag

  32. Mark Essel says:

    Was it because the amount was less than a minimum required balance they have setup (when I first read the post I thought they zero'd your son's account).

  33. Joe D says:

    there are a few defining moments as a child- this is one- argue and protest ??, bitch and moan ?? or….sack-up and buy the stock and accumulate wealth- my gut is Howard has his liittle guy long the dec call options and will someday do a hostile take-over of the bank !

    • hi Joe…i am too small to mess with this parasitic fungus.

      i will stick to real time web, apple, google, amazon but make Bank of
      America pay me back and protest by non use.

      i vote with my feet and wallet

      i try not to bitch on this blog but am hoping someone at Bank of america
      would monior stream and maybe reach out. obviously not.

  34. Joe D says:

    there are a few defining moments as a child- this is one- argue and protest ??, bitch and moan ?? or….sack-up and buy the stock and accumulate wealth- my gut is Howard has his liittle guy long the dec call options and will someday do a hostile take-over of the bank !

  35. hi Joe…i am too small to mess with this parasitic fungus.

    i will stick to real time web, apple, google, amazon but make Bank of
    America pay me back and protest by non use.

    i vote with my feet and wallet

    i try not to bitch on this blog but am hoping someone at Bank of america
    would monior stream and maybe reach out. obviously not.

  36. Anonymous says:

    One word -well OK two (2) words – CREDIT UNION. they actually act like banks, but are nice when they take your money! TOO FUNNY!

  37. engrmathman says:

    One word -well OK two (2) words – CREDIT UNION. they actually act like banks, but are nice when they take your money! TOO FUNNY!

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  40. stockmanmarc says:

    Hi Howard,

    I to have had problems with these Turkeys, even took a hit in their POS stock. Make sure they don’t nick your kids accounts for a management fee, they tried that crap with me. BB&T is a good one, they at least give you a coffee cup, a hat and remember your name when you open account.

  41. stockmanmarc says:

    Hi Howard,

    I to have had problems with these Turkeys, even took a hit in their POS stock. Make sure they don't nick your kids accounts for a management fee, they tried that crap with me. BB&T is a good one, they at least give you a coffee cup, a hat and remember your name when you open account.

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